Am i dating a serial monogamist
In the Western world, true monogamy is perhaps becoming less and less common, as more marriages than ever split up within three years.Since a serial monogamist might stay with a partner for that length of time or even longer, he or she might be annoyed by the label.We all may try to be a little flirty on the first date, but you don't want to see a certain type of doe eye. Some of my friends say it's romantic (I say it's creepy as hell), but it's definitely one to look out for. If they are going on about how much they love cats and then as soon as you admit you hate them they start to qualify, saying they really don't love them that much— then ding, ding, ding. Even if it's just a first date, if they don't mention friends at any point then it's a big sign, especially if it's combined with trying to make plans way in advance.While being a serial monogamist is fine, you don't want someone changing themselves on a first date (or ever). If you clearly aren't feeling it, but they're plowing on ahead, there's a good chance they're the kind of person who will try to make it work at any cost. This isn't to say that serial monogamists don't have friends, but it could potentially be a sign that they don't make time for their friends because they get wrapped up in relationships, which if you're looking to take things slow, is probably a red flag. This does not mean that he or she does not try to commit, but it seems that commitment is not something the person feels comfortable with.In comparison, true monogamy is a state in which one person stays with another for his or her entire life.If the partnership begins to show problems similar to those witnessed in childhood, then it will no longer mirror the ideal the serial monogamist has in his or her head.Many people think that they can be the one to change the serial monogamist's way of thinking, but this is sometimes a futile effort.
But if you're looking to tip your toe in the dating pool, or hoping it to take it slow, you two are probably not going to be a great match.The relationship pattern is often so established that the person can even predict the month or year that the break up will occur.It's rare that someone seeks to end a relationship willingly if there are no problems, but for some serial monogamists, the fear of commitment is beyond their control.So it's good to be able to gauge what the other person is looking for so you can make sure you're both on the same page about what you want. Here are seven signs you can look for right on the first date: First date and they're talking about a concert two months from now? Maybe you jump at the idea of someone who can commit and plan ahead, or maybe you want someone who want to cool things off and make sure they want to be with you specifically, not just the next person that comes along.This may not come up on the first date (hopefully it won't, because it's awkward), but if it does it can be really telling.