Dating a man going through a divorce

Here are eight strategies for dating someone going through a divorce: While you shouldn’t make his divorce the sole focus of every interaction, or let him vent uncontrollably, or trash his ex (all red flags), it’s essential that you give him opportunities to share with you as his marriage was a major component of his life.

Understand that his past is bound to come up, and this is a normal part of dating a separated or divorced man.

Wanting to be ready to move on post-divorce is different than actually being ready.

The difference between the two is based on a number of individualized factors. ), and his capacity to own and reflect on what happened.

These are all indicators that your relationship is not the real deal, and, while this reality stings, it is not about you.

It shows he has a lot of work to do to process his divorce, and it’s best to stop dating him if you are looking for a genuine lasting connection.

Also, bad-mouthing his ex in front of his children is a complete no-no.

Consider his emotional availability, the circumstances of his marriage and divorce (Was it amicable? Listen closely as he shares his past with you to better gauge where he is emotionally and if he has truly moved on and is ready to be a partner to you.

Rather than focusing on the the length of time he has been divorced, you’ll get much better information by tuning into what he is saying and how it makes you feel.

Word of caution: This advice goes out the window if his marriage ended due to him engaging in infidelity, which is a major red flag.

Also, be careful with assuming just because he has been married before, he is open to being married again.

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Also, don’t take it personally if he wants to move slow or keep your relationship quiet at the beginning (as long as he is treating you well and engaging with you).

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